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Duende Diary (XI)
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Photo: USA Really

Duende Diary (XI)


September 11th

My book is over. I stole the new one from my mistress. So let’s start.  I am El Duende, the spirit of evocation. I was born about 500 years ago; I do not remember exactly when.  My memory doesn’t serve me so well now. The last 100 years I still remember, but what was before, I only have a vague idea... That's why I decided to start a diary.

Once again I am a spirit, a Ghost. Usually no one sees me, but when I forget to turn on “stealth mode,” people get frightened. Even the mistress does. She called for a fat pastor with the exorcist's stuff and for some freaks who claimed that I am the Ghost of the former owner. Idiots. I’m the spirit of evocation, not some bloody former owner. Especially since he has passed some time ago. Even though he promised to come back. But I'm harmless. I care about the house, about the order in the house… but they get frightened. As today I had a really bad headache all day, and asked the hostess for pills. Anyway, now we both need pills. Me from the headache, mistress-for diarrhea.  Although she feels nervous because of the hurricane. Maybe… At least the cat is nervous. They promised a record rise in water on TV, and he said he never learned to swim. But he worried in vain, it will not affect us. Although in any case it is better to be prepared. The power plants could be damaged. If nuclear, then there is no need to prepare. But if not it we will have to sit without light. Need to store up some candles.  And not like that  Connecticut woman who mistook a stick of dynamite for a candle during a power outage and suffered severe hand injuries. It shouldn’t be like that…

September 12th

Mistress was getting ready for her date all morning. If she was Hitler in a past life then the war would not have started because he would have stood for four years on the border, trying to decide what direction to comb the bangs. And then he would get upset and run off to cry in his Nazi toilet. This is gonna sound weird, but I'm really sorry my mistress wasn't Hitler.
After all, bangs to the left. The cat lost the bowl. But no! Rightwards. Or is it left? The parrot says we look like tennis fans right now.

He told that heard on radio that the Frenchwoman from the city of Reims for 3 months before a wedding was thrown by the groom, but she decided that it is not a reason to cancel a ceremony and arranged a wedding with herself. And after the ceremony, she froze her egg cells for the future. There were 40 cats among the guests. What is he talking about? The wedding will not happen! It will never happen. This is our mistress. The cat objected, he really liked the idea of 40 cats, but the parrot assured that after the wedding everything will be different. In support of his words, he showed the news about how a British couple gave birth to a son, called him Star Cloud and then decided to change their sex! The child already calls mom-dad and vice versa. Some on the Internet have predicted their son will become a serial killer.

Duende Diary (XI)

Who's Mama? Who's Dad? I never understood. I've heard a lot about weddings changing people. But to be so radical, there will be no wedding. That’s for sure.

September 13th

Surfed the Net. I came across “Roscosmos” reports that American astronauts could intentionally drill a hole in the Soyuz MS-09 spacecraft. Damage to the ship was necessary for the U.S. astronauts to quickly return to Earth for one of their sick colleagues. Doubtful. Shared this news with parrot. He's a big space expert. His neighborhood boys once almost launched him into space on a homemade rocket. Already tied up and were ready to burn. The mistress took the firecracker away.

The Parrot began to surf the Net, and then mobilized the turtle. As a result, they found on Russian forums that everything happened for a woman? As usual. No, there were no love polygons. There they all stand for emancipation, equality, etc. Even Russians do. Of course, they lie. Just Russians… In short, the woman had serious emotional and psychological problems. She's been raising holy hell at the station. The American crew asked “Houston” to send her back to Earth for health reasons. But the Russians refused. “Houston” considered how much the unplanned evacuation of hysterical women will cost and advised astronauts to hold on, but gave no money.

But they are astronauts! They never give up! They decided to resort to tricks - to drill a hole in the bathroom of Russians, and then covered it with sealant so it wouldn’t not immediately burst. I need to say that the idea was quite creative. Because the pressure in the station is only one atmosphere. And when a leak was detected, it was possible to insist on crew emergency evacuation. At the same time having a lot of advantages:

1. Get rid of the hateful drama queen.

2. Get yourself out of man-made hell.

3. Put all down on Russian butterfingers.

Especially since the astronauts’ module would be burned in the atmosphere because of decompression along with all the evidence. But something went wrong.

The Russians bailed on that hole, sealing it with their special glue-sealant, which after hardening survived an excessive load. They refused the evacuation and stopped letting anyone into their sector. Then the scandal began... the Roscosmos statement. And all this because of a woman. Well, it's frightful bad luck to bring a woman aboard. The parrot says sailors know that. Now it says that it is stupidity, but if sailors believed in it for hundred years, perhaps there is a good reason for that.

But maybe it’s all one more Russian fake. Who knows.

September 14th

I watched a beauty pageant. I don't get why people like them. They’re all skinny as a skeleton. They can appeal only to doctors and pathologists! My mistress is much better. And here still Miss America-2019 Nia Franklin declared that she was very glad that there was no competition in bikinis, otherwise "it would be necessary to eat less".  Well, that's right, let her be happy.  If immigration continues, then in a couple of years we will watch the competition in the hijab. There will be no need for hunger then.

September 15th

On TV all day talking about trade wars. Donald Trump ordered additional duties on goods imported into the country from China. The measure could affect a total of $200 billion in consumer goods, clothing accessories, and electronics. In June, the United States already introduced a 25% tariff on China goods in the amount of $50 billion a year.

The cat also expressed its civil position and shit on the neighbor's Chinese car. And then he thought a bit and did it on the Japanese one. Trump is so unpredictable.

Meanwhile experts say that the tariffs won't affect Apple products. That's right. It’s so expensive.

By the way Apple has set a record for the cost of repairing smartphones. The new record holder is iPhone XS Max. Repair of its display will cost the owner $329, and fully repair the smartphone will be for $599.

Now one needs more than just one loan. At least two loans are needed. One loan is for the iPhone, the second is for its repair bill.

September 16th

The mistress ran away to her boyfriend, the cat hid somewhere and apparently fell asleep. He always does it when he's needed. I called the parrot and we started playing cops. The task was to find, sneak up and shoot the cat from the spray for ironing. And then make it his fault. At least that's what real cops do in Dallas. There was news that the Dallas Police tried to find evidence that could discredit the man they killed by mistake.

A female Dallas police officer Amber Guyger finished her shift and went home, but went to the wrong floor and wrong apartment. She shot and killed 26-year-old Botham Jean, whose family is now calling for action

Lawyers for the victim's family report that police officers right after the incident started began searching the man's apartment in search of drugs or any other things which could compromise him. In the apartment of the dead man, there were about 10 grams of marijuana.

30-year-old amber Geiger later explained that he “ignored orders”.

It is strange that it doesn't raise any noise about racial discrimination. She's white. He's black. It's definitely discrimination. Although she may be Latino, that's another thing. Now it is not fashionable to be white. White people are persecuted everywhere, even in games.

Swedish computer game developer DICE, owned by Electronic Arts, introduced censorship in the game chat for Battlefield 5.

"An unpleasant" words or phrases are automatically replaced by ***. The player in the video tries to write 'white man', after which the words are replaced by '********', then the player writes the phrase 'black man', that censorship passes. The abbreviation 'DLC' (but not 'free DLC') also falls under censorship, the same with any obscene expression, as well as the word 'Nazi', 'Jews' (in the game about the second world).

This could be further proof of the existence of the white genocide.

Author: El Duende