Amazon’s Penis-rocket Is to Penetrate the Moon in 2020
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON – May 29, 2018
The obscenely wealthy Jeff Bezos, the wealthiest man in the world according to Forbes and the owner of Amazon, recently announced large-scale colonization plans for the moon. He believes we should move all heavy and dirty industry off Earth and into space, where we’ll be able to use free 24/7 solar power.
“The Earth is not a very good place to do heavy industry. It’s convenient for us right now, but in the not-too-distant future, I’m talking decades, maybe 100 years, it’ll start to be easier to do a lot of the things that we currently do on Earth in space, because we’ll have so much energy,” Bezos said to GeekWire. “But today, we must go back to the moon, and this time to stay.”
Amazon’s owner thinks that there’s no better place for the first out-of-Earth settlement than the moon, as there’s are an abundance of materials and water there.
“We’re so lucky to have the moon. It’s so conveniently located. ... We know that there are volatiles trapped in the dark craters of the moon that are perpetually shaded. We know that there’s water there. There’s ice there. There are probably other interesting things in those craters as well.”
The billionaire plans to work with NASA and European Space Agency to create a permanent settlement on the moon. In 2000, he founded a company Blue Origin to develop space tourism. According to Bezos, he is going to go with his lunar program even if public-private partnerships cannot work. It’s just a matter of time.
“We’ll do that even if NASA doesn’t do it. We’ll do it eventually. But we could do it a lot faster if there were a partnership.”
Blue Origin will soon test its rocket and capsule, the News Shepard 2.0, which will serve as the basis for the moon program. Anyone with enough money to spare can buy themselves a place on the moon-mission, but they'll have to wait until sometime in the 2020s for a real chance to fly.
Max Knoblauch compared the shape of the rocket to a penis, which an appraisal which lately has been widely agreed with. Mashable published his article: ‘Jeff Bezos' new rocket looks more like a penis than other rockets’ on April 30, 2015
“Perhaps more importantly, however, the new rocket looks exactly like a penis,” Knoblauch wrote. “Which isn't to say that every rocket isn't at least mildly phallic. That's the whole point of rockets. But this one is an evolution in the ‘rockets that look like penises’ field.